Counseling & Therapy Services at MyTherapist New York
Think therapy is just for "crazy people"? Therapy with me involves evidence-based, cognitive behavioral therapy techniques that go way beyond just listening to peoples' problems and giving well-intentioned advice. People come to therapy for disturbed mood (such as anger, anxiety, panic and depression), family conflicts, behavioral disturbances and acting out unhealthy behaviors, relationship conflicts, social problems, career issues, sex issues, anger management and more. Therapy (or counseling) can help you face and change the things you're feeling stuck with now, and better prepare you for the inevitable conflicts that you'll come up against in the future. Sometimes you just need help setting goals to address problem areas in your life, and coaching seems a more appropriate model than intensive psychotherapy. Whatever you need help with, it starts with coming in for an intake assessment so we can talk over your situation and figure out a plan of action.
Whether online via webcam or in office, all counseling, coaching and therapy services with us begins with an initial diagnostic interview and assessment (also known as an intake). During this session we try to get a general idea of what conflicts you're having as well as what goals you want to set for our work together. Whether individual couples or other relationships - all of our work starts with an individual intake.
The intake might also be appropriate when follow-up services are unneeded, in cases like gender identity issues (hormone readiness letters, surgery support letters), bariatric surgery (surgery readiness letters), court-ordered assessments such as likely recidivism in cases like juvenile sex offenders, etc.
We can't fix a lifetime of problems in one session, and the intake assessment helps us get to the therapy component of our work together in a focused and effective way!
Counselors counsel! For what? Well- what are you having troubles with during your time here on the planet? We use the science of psychology to help you examine the thoughts, feelings and behaviors that might be keeping you stuck. You deserve to live your best life. Counseling aims to teach you a tangible set of skills to pull from not only to help you navigate your current conflicts, but to be more fully prepared to navigate the ones that are sure to come in the future. We start weekly for the first 6-8 sessions, taking special care to monitor our progress from one session to the next. If we’re making progress, we’ll check in on frequency of sessions. The goal will be you coming in less often and doing more of our work on your own. How long this will take is hard to say, but with the feedback we collect each session, we can make sure the sessions with your counselor are effective and helpful in your goal of making lasting, positive change in your life. We offer counseling, therapy and coaching online via webcam and in our Manhattan office.
We often get clients who tell us they haven't ever felt comfortable talking about sex in therapy. Our therapists have a specialized training, experience and interest in working with relationships and sexuality of all sorts of flavors, and by using an evidence-based, yet warm and non-judgmental approach, you can be sure you're getting affordable, effective, modern relationship therapy (including family therapy and couples counseling) and sex therapy for the 21st Century. You have to struggle enough with people telling you who you should be and how you should behave- your therapist doesn't have to add to that. Our counselors work together to help you make lasting change.
Sex therapy is counseling with a focus on sexual health and wellness for those dealing with sexual dysfunctions or any conflicts related to sexuality, and is appropriate for individuals or relationships.
A relatively short-term intervention to get your relationship back on track. By creating a safe space for you to create a common vision of your relationship, we work on helping you to communicate your needs and desires and to trust and accept your partner unconditionally (called unconditional other acceptance). To do this, we alternate between seeing you as individuals one week, and together with your partner/s the following week, which encourages differentiation (taking responsibility for your own role in the relationship and the conflicts that come up) as well as relationship growth and evolution.
What does your relationship Look Like? What would you like it to look like?
If you're in a relationship, it's probably best to deal with your issues within the context of your relationship. Relationship counseling (aka couples counseling, pre-marital counseling, marital therapy, etc) focuses on identifying what each of you want in your ideal relationship, and helping you communicate those desires in a compassionate and effective way.
Relationship counseling involves examining various aspects of your relationship including career, finances, sex life, parenting, family of origin, and more. Think your issues are your own? Maybe - but you are bringing those issues to your relationship. We want to work with you systemically, that means working through issues within the context of your larger relationships. For the sake of ease, we describe this in terms of 2 people in a couple, but we welcome and affirm whatever safe, sane and consensual relationship you have designed (open relationships, triads, poly, etc). All of our therapists are sex-positive, LGBTQ-affirming, kink aware and secular. Relationship therapy is not out to save your relationship at all costs. Couples therapists have no agenda about helping you save or end your relationship, but we are out to help you design a relationship that is ideal for the people involved. Sometimes the most successful couples therapy is when you decide this isn't the relationship for you. The world is your oyster!
Unfortunately, insurance does not cover couples therapy, relationship therapy or marriage therapy. Insurance requires the diagnosis of an illness, and a relationship, while maybe dysfunctional, cannot be "ill", as it were. You might be able to get your individual sessions covered by insurance depending on your plan, but it just doesn't work for relationship therapy. Call your insurance for a referral to someone in network for individual counseling related to mental illness diagnoses.
Open relationships, polyamory, multiamory, swingers, monogamish, compersion - there are all sorts of relationship styles and concepts beyond monogamy.
While some people find themselves in a pair bond, others realize that sexual fidelity and monogamy is not the default relationship style for everyone.
Working with a therapist who does not hold monogamy up as an ideal, enlightened state of being is important when working through the issues that might come up in opening your relationship or designing a relationship that works for you.
There are countless relationship styles and arrangements that have always existed. Let's design a relationship that might work for the people involved, rather than trying to copy what we think happened in 1950's middle-America.
A note from Dr. DeMArco
There are many psychotherapists, psychologists, social workers and religious clergy who claim to work with couples and relationships. My masters in Psychology emphasis was marriage and family therapy, and I have been licensed in New York and Vermont as a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, held clinical membership in AAMFT, the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy, as well as a board position in the New York Association of Marriage and Family Therapy. I have clinically supervised MFT's, MHC's and LPC's in training since 2006.
All of our staff are chosen because of their passion in working with a sex-positive style of counseling that is compassionate and effective regardless of the type of relationship you’re in. We look forward to working with you.
-Michael DeMarco, PhD